Welcome to the internet! Welcome to the internet! Bem-vindo à internet! Have a look around Have a look around Olhe ao seu redor Anything that brain of yours Anything that brain of yours Qualquer coisa que seu cérebro Can think of can be found Can think of can be found Possa pensar pode ser encontrada We've got mountains of content We've got mountains of content Temos montanhas de conteúdo Some better, some worse Some better, some worse Alguns melhores, outros piores If none of it's of interest to you If none of it's of interest to you Se nada disso for do seu interesse You'd be the first You'd be the first Você seria o primeiro Welcome to the internet! Welcome to the internet! Bem-vindo à internet! Come and take a seat Come and take a seat Venha e puxe uma cadeira Would you like to see the news Would you like to see the news Você gostaria de ver as notícias Or any famous women's feet? Or any famous women's feet? Ou os pés de alguma mulher famosa? There's no need to panic There's no need to panic Não precisa entrar em pânico This isn't a test, haha This isn't a test, haha Isso não é um teste, haha Just nod or shake your head Just nod or shake your head Apenas acene com a cabeça ou balance a cabeça And we'll do the rest And we'll do the rest E nós faremos o resto Welcome to th? internet! Welcome to th? internet! Bem-vindo à internet! What would you pref?r? What would you pref?r? O que você prefere? Would you like to fight for civil rights Would you like to fight for civil rights Você gostaria de lutar pelos direitos civis Or tweet a racial slur? Or tweet a racial slur? Ou tweetar uma frase racista? Be happy! Be horny! Be bursting with rage! Be happy! Be horny! Be bursting with rage! Seja feliz! Fique com tesão! Fique louco de raiva! We've got a million different ways to engage We've got a million different ways to engage Temos um milhão de maneiras diferentes de se envolver Welcome to the internet! Welcome to the internet! Bem-vindo à internet! Put your cares aside Put your cares aside Coloque suas preocupações de lado Here's a tip for straining pasta Here's a tip for straining pasta Aqui está uma dica para coar macarrão Here's a nine-year-old who died Here's a nine-year-old who died Aqui está uma criança de nove anos que morreu We've got movies We've got movies Temos filmes And doctors and fantasy sports And doctors and fantasy sports E médicos e esportes de fantasia And a bunch of colored-pencil drawings And a bunch of colored-pencil drawings E um monte de desenhos feitos com lápis de cor Of all the different characters Of all the different characters De todos os diferentes personagens In Harry Potter fucking each other In Harry Potter fucking each other De Harry Potter transando um com o outro Welcome to the internet! Welcome to the internet! Bem-vindo à internet! Hold on to your socks Hold on to your socks Segure firmemente as suas meias 'Cause a random guy just kindly 'Cause a random guy just kindly Porque um cara aleatório gentilmente Sent you photos of his cock Sent you photos of his cock Te mandou fotos do seu pau They are grainy and off-putting They are grainy and off-putting São granuladas e desagradáveis He just sent you more He just sent you more Ele acabou de te enviar mais Don't act surprised Don't act surprised Não se faça de surpresa You know you like it, you whore You know you like it, you whore Você sabe que gosta, sua puta See a man beheaded, See a man beheaded, Veja um homem decapitado get offended, see a shrink get offended, see a shrink Fique ofendido, veja um psiquiatra Show us pictures of your children Show us pictures of your children Mostre-nos fotos de seus filhos Tell us every thought you think Tell us every thought you think Diga-nos cada coisa que você pensa Start a rumor, buy a broom Start a rumor, buy a broom Comece um boato, compre uma vassoura Or send a death threat to a boomer Or send a death threat to a boomer Ou envie uma ameaça de morte a um perdedor Or dm a girl and groom her Or dm a girl and groom her Ou mande DM pra uma garota e a alicie Do a zoom or find a tumor in your— Do a zoom or find a tumor in your— Dê um zoom ou encontre um tumor no seu — Here's a healthy breakfast option Here's a healthy breakfast option Aqui está uma opção de café da manhã saudável You should kill your mom You should kill your mom Você devia matar sua mãe Here's why women never fuck you Here's why women never fuck you Veja por que as mulheres nunca dão pra você Here's how you can build a bomb Here's how you can build a bomb Veja como construir uma bomba Which power ranger are you? Which power ranger are you? Qual Power Ranger é você? Take this quirky quiz Take this quirky quiz Faça este teste divertido Obama sent the immigrants Obama sent the immigrants Obama enviou imigrantes To vaccinate your kids To vaccinate your kids Para vacinar seus filhos Could I interest you in everything all of the time? Could I interest you in everything all of the time? Posso te deixar interessado em tudo o tempo todo? A little bit of everything all of the time A little bit of everything all of the time Um pouco de tudo o tempo todo Apathy's a tragedy and boredom is a crime Apathy's a tragedy and boredom is a crime A apatia é uma tragédia e o tédio é um crime Anything and everything, all of the time Anything and everything, all of the time Qualquer coisa e tudo, o tempo todo Could I interest you in everything all of the time? Could I interest you in everything all of the time? Posso te deixar interessado em tudo o tempo todo? A little bit of everything all of the time A little bit of everything all of the time Um pouco de tudo o tempo todo Apathy's a tragedy, and boredom is a crime Apathy's a tragedy, and boredom is a crime A apatia é uma tragédia e o tédio é um crime Anything and everything all of the time Anything and everything all of the time Qualquer coisa e tudo, o tempo todo You know, it wasn't always like this You know, it wasn't always like this Sabe, nem sempre foi assim Not very long ago, just before your time Not very long ago, just before your time Não muito tempo atrás, pouco antes do seu tempo Right before the towers fell, circa '99 Right before the towers fell, circa '99 Pouco antes das torres caírem, lá por 99 This was catalogs, travel blogs, a chatroom or two This was catalogs, travel blogs, a chatroom or two Eram catálogos, blogs de viagens, uma ou duas salas de bate-papo We set our sights We set our sights Nos preparamos And spent our nights waiting for you! And spent our nights waiting for you! E passamos noites à sua espera! You, insatiable you You, insatiable you Você, seu insaciável Mommy let you use her iPad, you were barely two Mommy let you use her iPad, you were barely two Mamãe te deixava usar o iPad dela, você mal tinha dois anos And it did all the things we designed it to do And it did all the things we designed it to do E ele fazia tudo que o projetamos para fazer Now, look at you! Oh, look at you! Now, look at you! Oh, look at you! Agora, olhe para você! Ah, olhe para você! You, you! Unstoppable, watchable You, you! Unstoppable, watchable Você, você! Imparável, assistível Your time is now, your inside's out Your time is now, your inside's out Sua hora é agora, você está com tudo Honey, how you grew Honey, how you grew Meu bem, como você cresceu And if we stick together And if we stick together E se ficarmos juntos Who knows what we'll do? Who knows what we'll do? Quem sabe o que faremos? It was always the plan It was always the plan Sempre foi o plano To put the world in your hand To put the world in your hand Colocar o mundo em suas mãos Could I interest you in everything all of the time? Could I interest you in everything all of the time? Posso te deixar interessado em tudo o tempo todo? A bit of everything all of the time A bit of everything all of the time Um pouco de tudo o tempo todo Apathy's a tragedy, and boredom is a crime Apathy's a tragedy, and boredom is a crime A apatia é uma tragédia e o tédio é um crime Anything and everything all of the time Anything and everything all of the time Qualquer coisa e tudo, o tempo todo Could I interest you in everything all of the time? Could I interest you in everything all of the time? Posso te deixar interessado em tudo o tempo todo? A little bit of everything all of the time A little bit of everything all of the time Um pouco de tudo o tempo todo Apathy's a tragedy, and boredom is a crime Apathy's a tragedy, and boredom is a crime A apatia é uma tragédia e o tédio é um crime Anything and everything Anything and everything Qualquer coisa e tudo And anything and everything And anything and everything E qualquer coisa e tudo And anything and everything and And anything and everything and E tudo e qualquer coisa e All of the time All of the time O tempo todo