When I look back
Tracing fingertips
Over plastic bags
Thinking I wish I could extrapolate
Some small intention
Or maybe just get your attention
For a minute or two

Will I die?
Or will I get to that ten year mark
Where I beat the extinction
Of telomeres
And if I do, will you be there with me?
Father, sister, brother

Charlie, stop smoking
Caroline, will you be with me?
Will the baby be alright?
Will I have one of mine?
Can I handle it
Even if I do?
You said that I might
It’s not fair, or so they said
To carry a child
I guess I’ll be fine

It wasn’t my idea
The cocktail of things
That twist neurons inside
But without them
I’d die

They say there’s irony in the music
It’s a tragedy, I
See nothing Greek in it

Give me a mausoleum
In Rhode Island
With Dad, Grandma, Grandpa, and Dave
Who hung himself real high
In the National Park sky
It’s a shame
And I’m crying right now
To get to you, save you
If I take my life
Find your astral body
Put it into my eyes
Give you two seconds to cry

Take you home, I
I’ll give you a blanket
Your spirit can sit and watch TV by my side
‘Cause baby, I
Ran through a time when I felt you were doing it
I couldn’t handle it
I was in Monaco
I couldn’t hear what they said on the telephone
I had to sing for the Prince in two hours
Sat in the shower
Gave myself two seconds to cry
It’s a shame that we die

When I was 15, naked
Next door neighbors did a drive-by
Pulled me up by my waist
Long hair, to the beach side
I wanted to go out like you
Swim with the fishes
That he caught on Rhode Island beaches
But sometimes it’s just not your time

Caroline
What kind of mother was she to say
I’d end up in institutions?
All I wanted to do was kiss Aaron Green
And sit by the lake
Twisting lime into the drinks
That they made
Have a babe at 16
The town I was born in and die
Aaron ended up dead and not me
What the fuck’s wrong in your head
To send me away never to come back
Exotic places and people
To take the place of being your child?

I give myself two seconds to cry
Let it crash over me
Like the waves in the sea
Call me Aphrodite
As they bow down to me

Sunbather, Moon chaser
Queen of empathy
I give myself two seconds to breathe
And go back to being a serene queen

I just needed two seconds to be me