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Nobody Knows I'm Famous

Peter Mayer

Nobody knows I’m famous
So I have to go around and say it
When I’m in public, I cover up my face with my hands
So people don’t realize that they don’t know who I am

I sent a picture to the paparazzi
A nice 8 x 10 glossy of me
And directions that show how to get to my home
Along with a note that says “please stalk me”
Nobody knows I’m famous

I put an add in the singles column
That says “supermodel wanted:
I’m a famous white male but no one knows that it’s true
I think it might be more convincing if I’m married to you”

I wrote a book that says I’m something
And I hand copies out for nothing
And if you won’t take me up, I say I’ll throw in a buck,
And make it two dollars if you ask me to sign it
Nobody knows I’m famous

No one knows that everybody’s talking all about me
Unless they’re just pretending out of jealousy and envy
I use the utmost of discretion to attract lots of attention
But elude the recognition I deserve

I’ve got big time tinted windows
On my Jet Black Geo Metro
I’ve got my own body guard but he gets bored a lot
And so I hired a fanatic that he has to fight off

So if you see me, take a picture
Point at me and whisper
I’m the Hollywood type
Born for the lime light
But I’m having a tough time creating a buzz because
Nobody knows I’m famous






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