Jillian was her name Jillian was her name Jillian era seu nome She was sweeter than aspartame She was sweeter than aspartame Ela era mais doce do que aspartame Her kisses reconfigured my dna Her kisses reconfigured my dna Seus beijos reconfiguraram meu DNA And after that I never was the same And after that I never was the same E depois disso nunca mais fui o mesmo And I loved her even more And I loved her even more E eu a amava ainda mais Than Marlon Brando loved souffle Than Marlon Brando loved souffle Do que o amado suflê do Marlon Brando She was gorgeous, she was charming She was gorgeous, she was charming Ela era linda, ela era charmosa Yeah, she was perfect in every way Yeah, she was perfect in every way É, ela era perfeita de todo jeito Except she was always using the word infer Except she was always using the word infer Exceto porque ela sempre usava a palavra deduzir When she obviously meant imply When she obviously meant imply Quando obviamente ela queria dizer insinuar And I know some guys would put up with that kind of thing And I know some guys would put up with that kind of thing E eu sei que alguns caras relevariam esse tipo de coisa But frankly, I can't imagine why But frankly, I can't imagine why Mas francamente, eu não posso imaginar porquê And I told her, I said And I told her, I said E eu disse a ela, eu disse Hey! Are we playing horseshoes, honey? Hey! Are we playing horseshoes, honey? Ei! Nós estamos jogando ferraduras, querida? No, I don't think we are! No, I don't think we are! Não, eu não acho que estamos! You're close! (close!) You're close! (close!) Você é tão perto! But no cigar! But no cigar! Mas não chega lá! Then I met sweet young janet Then I met sweet young janet Então eu conheci a doce e jovem Janet Prettiest thing on the planet Prettiest thing on the planet A coisa mais bela do planeta Had a body hotter than a habanero Had a body hotter than a habanero Tinha um corpo mais quente que habanero She had lips like a ripe pomegranate She had lips like a ripe pomegranate Ela tinha lábios como uma romã madura And I was crazy like manson about her And I was crazy like manson about her E eu estava doido por ela como Manson She got me all choked up like mama cass She got me all choked up like mama cass Ela me sufocava como Mama Cass She had a smile so incredibly radiant She had a smile so incredibly radiant Ela tinha um sorriso tão incrivelmente radiante You had to watch it through a piece of smoked glass You had to watch it through a piece of smoked glass Que você tinha que ver através de um vidro fumê I thought after all these years of searching around I thought after all these years of searching around Eu pensei depois de todos esses anos procurando I'd found my soulmate finally I'd found my soulmate finally Eu encontraria minha alma-gêmea finalmente But one day I found she actually owned a copy But one day I found she actually owned a copy Mas um dia eu descobri que ela tinha uma cópia Of Joe Dirt on dvd Of Joe Dirt on dvd do DVD do Joe Sujo Oh, no! I said Oh, no! I said Oh, não! Eu disse! Hey! Are we lobbing hand grenades, kiddo? Hey! Are we lobbing hand grenades, kiddo? Ei! Nós estamos arremessando granadas, criança? No I don't think we are! No I don't think we are! Não, eu não acho que estamos! You're close! (close!) You're close! (close!) Você é tão perto! Oh, so very close! (close!) Oh, so very close! (close!) Oh, tão, tão perto! Yeah, baby, you're close! (close!) Yeah, baby, you're close! (close!) É, baby, tão perto! So close! So close! Tão perto! But no cigar! But no cigar! Mas não chega lá! (Oh, yeah!) (Oh, yeah!) (Oh, yeah!) (Oh, no!) (Oh, no!) (Oh, não!) (Oh, yeah!) (Oh, yeah!) (Oh, yeah!) (Oh, no!) (Oh, no!) (Oh, não!) (Oh, yeah!) (Oh, yeah!) (Oh, yeah!) (Oh, no!) (Oh, no!) (Oh, não!) (All right!) (All right!) (Tudo bem!) Julie played water polo Julie played water polo Julie jogava polo aquático She wore a ribbon on her left manolo She wore a ribbon on her left manolo Ela usava uma fita no seu Manolo esquerdo She had me sweating like nixon every time she was near She had me sweating like nixon every time she was near Ela me fazia suar como Nixon toda vez que estava perto My heart was beating like a buddy rif solo My heart was beating like a buddy rif solo Meu coração batia como um solo do Buddy And she was everything I've dreamed of And she was everything I've dreamed of E ela era tudo que eu sonhava She moved right up to #1 on my list She moved right up to #1 on my list Ela logo foi para o topo da minha lista And did I mention she's a world famous billionare And did I mention she's a world famous billionare E eu mencionei que ela era uma bilionária famosa Bikini supermodel astrophysicist Bikini supermodel astrophysicist supermodelo de biquíni, astrofísica Yeah, she was so pretty she made charlize theron Yeah, she was so pretty she made charlize theron É, ela era tão bonita que fazia Charlize Theron Look like a big fat slobbering pig Look like a big fat slobbering pig Parecer um porco gordo babando The only caveat is one of her earlobes The only caveat is one of her earlobes O único problema era que um de seus lobos Was just a little tiny bit too big Was just a little tiny bit too big Era só um pouquinhozinho muito grande I said I said Eu disse Hey! Are we doing government work here? Hey! Are we doing government work here? Ei! Nós estamos fazendo trabalho de governo aqui? No I don't think we are! No I don't think we are! Não, eu não acho que estamos! You're close! (close!) You're close! (close!) Você é tão perto! So very, very close! (close!) So very, very close! (close!) Tão, tão perto! Aaw, baby, you're close! (close!) Aaw, baby, you're close! (close!) É, baby, você está tão perto! So close! So close! Tão perto! But no cigar! But no cigar! Mas não chega lá! Missed it by that much! (no cigar!) Missed it by that much! (no cigar!) Perdi por apenas isso! Ah, yeah! Ah, right! (no cigar!) Ah, yeah! Ah, right! (no cigar!) Ah, é! Ah, claro! Really, really, really close! (no cigar!) Really, really, really close! (no cigar!) Tão tão tão perto! But no cigar! But no cigar! Mas não chega lá!